Recently it has come to light that there is actually a man living on Mars -- candy bars, that is. Keith Sorrell, 37, a resident of Liverpool, England, claims he has lived on Mars Bar candy bars all his adult life.
Mr. Sorrell, a printer by trade, claims in a newspaper account (The Sun - a British paper) that he eats nothing but Mars Bars and has done so for the last 17 years. He feasts on 12 or so bars a day (more on weekends). For those number crunchers in the crowd, that comes out to about 4,000 bars a year for a grand total of 68,000 -- but who's counting?
Not to worry about him though because he assures us that he gets his nourishment from drinking plenty of orange juice and taking his vitamins; and on the weekends he does expand his dietary fare, adding vodka and rum mixed with (you guessed it) Mars Bar drinks.
So let's sum it up for you. Keith Sorrell gets his day off to a flying start with two or three Mars Bars for breakfast. At lunch he decides, "I think I'll have two or three of these very tasty Mars Bars." For supper he goes for a heaping helping of -- Mars Bars. And for a tasty treat, when he needs a pick-me-up between meals to sustain his energy level, Keith snacks on a single Mars Bar.
I should mention that the Mars Bar in the UK is similar to the Milky Way bar sold here in the US, consisting of nougat and caramel wrapped in milk chocolate. In 2002, the UK version of the Mars Bar was reformulated and is now more like the US version of the 3 Musketeers candy bar.
These bars, Keith is downing like popcorn, are 284-calories rich. That means Keith is not lacking for calories, getting about 3,400 per day and that doesn't even include the OJ.
This brings up some important issues and questions:
1. At Thanksgiving does Keith Sorrell say, "Please pass the Mars Bars over here ... I think I'll have another helping?"
2. When he goes on a diet, does Keith just cut back to 8 bars a day or does he cut out the orange juice?
3. What's his dentist bill like?
4. Does he own stock in the Mars candy bar company?
5. Is there something much more important than diet for our well-being, and if so, what is it?
Ed Mayhew is a speaker and the author of Fitter for Life and Fitter After 50 www.FitterForLife.com